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I am my Boss’ Bitch

5 Nov

 

Woman answering multipe phones black and white

 

Now that I am a working woman I have responsibilities. And these responsibilities include getting to work on time, responding to emails, dressing appropriately, acting professional, not cursing people out when they try my patience, planning events, approving timecards and leaving at 5pm. Not 3, 2 or unfortunately 10am. But 5pm; unless I work through lunch then I’m out of that bitch at 4 o’clock on the dot. Oh and I forgot the biggest responsibility of them all: being my boss’ bitch.

In case we haven’t met before, hello cruel world my name is London. I work within the education system. I wear twenty different hats at work on any given day and the most important one (at least for my success) is being Megan’s bitch. Who is Megan you ask? Megan is my direct supervisor.

She has thirteen years of experience in this field compared to my four, three of which I gained in college. She has a masters in this field. (I am on my tenth student loan payment for my undergraduate degree). She actually enjoys what we do and wants to learn more and advance in this field. I am searching for an escape route that leads to my desired field. She’s thirty and “established.” I’m twenty-three and confused, hung over and indecisive. She’s married and wants a child. I’m #singleinmy20s and think unruly children are an excellent form of birth control.

Despite all of these differences our paths have crossed in the form of me being her supervisee aka her bitch. I know you’re thinking London, working for someone doesn’t make you their bitch. But according to my very extensive work experience of one year this statement unfortunately is very true.

Over this past year I have quickly learned what my responsibilities are. I know you’re thinking: “London, can I call you Lo? In order to find out what your responsibilities are just read your job description and handbook.” First, no you may not call me anything other than London, Gorgeous or Queen of the World. Second, you would assume it is that easy but I promise you it is not. There is this four word clause in the job description that at first glance does not seem so bad but it is the phrase that turns you from employee to bitch. This phrase my darlings (cue scary music) is: “other duties as assigned.” See when you read it, it doesn’t sound bad. But trust me it is like your favorite MAC concealer, covering up the blemishes and making you look flawless. Underneath all the fabulous MAC is a bunch of assignments, errands, and headaches you do not want.

It was made very clear to me early on, the role I played in the company. I was the side bitch if you will. My assistant director, Harry, has a main bitch and a side bitch. That’s right you guessed it your beloved London is the side bitch. I do all the tasks the main bitch aka Megan does not want to do. So I do things like writing various reports, locating students, escorting students to different locations and even manual labor. I’m literally holding back tears from typing the “M” and “L” words and the horrible memories that have surfaced regarding those atrocious two words. Megan has had me do all kinds of things like drive to the store during the early stages of an oncoming blizzard to purchase office supplies and doughnuts for our office and students.

Obviously while I am doing these tasks I have time to reflect on 1. how shitty my life is and 2. what the hell can I do to not be the side bitch anymore. I constantly rack my brain thinking that there has to be a “quick fix” that will get us out of the bitch zone, the friend zone but for bitches. Sadly, I have come to the realization in my year working that there is no quick fix to getting out of the bitch zone. Everyone will work their way out of this zone in time.

So far the best way to expedite your travel process through the bitch zone is to remember that your main job, despite what your description says, is to make your boss look good. When they ask you to complete a presentation for them or do something else always give 100%. If you cannot do 100% give at least 80%-85%. I know we lived by the motto C’s get degrees in college but that really does not fly in the workplace. You have to give at least a solid “B” for effort and effectiveness. Although your boss may not give you the credit or recognition you desire they will realize, even if it is just internally, that they only look good/intelligent/efficient to their supervisors due to your efforts. And this will help you look better in their eyes and possibly set you up for a new position within the company or a positive recommendation letter for a job that is in your field.

I know that is probably not the answer or quick fix for getting out of bitch zone you were hoping for. But I try to count my blessings whenever I feel like the demands of the bitch zone are too much to bear. I remind myself that although there are several things about Megan that I do not care for, in the grand scheme of things she is not that bad. My rule of thumb is if your supervisor would not land a role in the movie Horrible Bosses then you have something to be grateful for. Megan has never inappropriately touched me, discriminated against me, created a hostile work environment or anything else HR worthy so all in all being her bitch is not the end of the world. Well maybe it is the end of the world but it certainly is not the end of the universe. Make sense? I know the bitch zone sucks, trust me I know. But in the words of Drake we have to start from the bottom so we can appreciate life when we get to the top. So for now I encourage you to cherish the “little things” and take in every moment of the bitch zone. So when we get to the top we can truly celebrate our success, think back to this very dark time in our lives aka the bitch zone and laugh. Of course the laughs will happen in between sips of my $30 Sex and the City-like cocktail. Lesson learned.

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